Recalling now my college days,

    At good old LSU,

My head imbued with purple haze,

    And golden foaming brew.

I met a girl with auburn braids,

    Those braids, I loved to tug.

The fairest of those southern maids,

    Her name, Regina Schnug.

Free concerts on the campus lawn,

    A blanket that we shared,

A love ongoing, but never gone,

    Down deep, I never cared.

Upon the night that I did score,

    That entry far too tight,

A pain which made me push no more,

    And give up for the night.

I thought about medieval time,

    The Iron Maiden death device.

A torture worse than heinous crime,

    For those imprisoned in that vise.

Now thinking of Miss Mighty Tight,

    That game released as less than fair,

She’ll wait until her wedding night,

    Or find a man with less down there.

end