OK, I need to get something off my chest, and I don’t know whether it makes me want to laugh or cry.  It makes me laugh because it reflects the stupidity of individuals, but it makes me want to cry because it’s also a statement on the stupidity of humanity as a whole.

For as far back as I can remember in my life, there has always been at least one Chick-fil-A in town.  Other than delicious waffle fries and fantastic chikin sandwiches, Chick-fil-A is known for one thing above all else:  THEY ARE CLOSED ON SUNDAYS!  They always have been; they always will be.  Everyone knows this … everyone!!  Yet for some reason, when I pass by a Chick-fil-A on a Sunday, invariably there is some dope sitting at the drive-thru window, wondering why nobody is taking his order.

Even if you are from Mars and have no idea what the place is, the fact that there are no cars in the parking lot at noon should tell you that either (A) this is a place you don’t want to eat, or (B) they are closed.  Hell, the fact that the lights are off should be the primary indicator.

So, apparently, the economy is in a shambles and society as we know it is on the verge of collapse.  Civilizations are failing and the world is quickly heading back to a Stone Age existence.  Thankfully, we have the media here to tell us all about how bad everything is.  I didn’t know all of this until I started looking for a house.  I don’t watch the news very often, and other than looking for people I know in the police and fire briefs and obituaries, I don’t read the newspaper, either, so I had no idea just how bad we were doing.

I didn’t notice, because I still had to wait an hour when going out to dinner on a Friday night.  You would think, with a total economic failure, I could walk right in and get a table for hibachi (nothing makes me happier than onion volcano). I didn’t notice, because the mall is still packed; so is every sporting event and even the interstate – and not just at 5pm: Get on the road about 2:30 on a Sunday, and there are people out and about, running errands and having weekend outings.

Seems to me, if the news outlets weren’t telling me how terrible things are, I just might still be enjoying life instead of hiding under the covers, waiting for it to all come to a fiery end.  If only we could get a few of them to start “predicting” a turnaround like they did this collapse, I bet this whole thing could be resolved by Tuesday.  I might be wrong, but every economic downturn I remember was always preceded by the media saying how they thought everything was getting bad, and recovered when they started talking about how it was all turning around.  Nothing ever seemed truly different before or after.

So, in summary, if you want to buy something, do it.  Especially if you ladies out there are looking to remodel your homes … I might be able to take some of that old furniture off your hands … at a large discount, of course – I mean, after all, we are entering a recession.

A quick fill-in-the-blank since, as of this writing, we haven’t had the election yet:

I can’t believe (candidate of your choice) got elected!  Looks like it’s going to be four years of (expletive of your choice).

It works for Democrats and Republicans!